


Strangest rescue

by Paytoplay



Category: clone wars - Fandom, starwars, the clone wars
Genre: Cannon compliant, Comedy, Crack, Gen, Lighthearted, no ships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:14:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 2,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24131905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paytoplay/pseuds/Paytoplay
Summary: Kenobi gets captured but surprisingly the separatists aren’t behind this. And nobody realizes he’s gone. Well, nobody he likes anyways.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 65





	1. Strangest rescue: part 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please don’t go to hard on me. First fic on here and I’m open to criticism.

Kenobi fought against the energy restraints. “Great” he thought “it’ll be days before they realize I’m missing” he thought to the long diplomatic mission Anakin and Cody where on. At this rate they would think he was just doing his part. It wouldn’t be until his end of the deal would fall flat that Anakin realize he was even gone. He was being held hostage in a maximum security prison on an unknown planet. He scanned the room he was in for weak points he could exploit. The hexagonal room had two doors and a darkened glass observation deck. The smaller and less secure door seemed to be connected to the deck. He also noticed an air vent in the ceiling to his left. No explicit weakness in the room though, and he knew there where many reinforced corridors beyond those doors. He would have to wait for an opening.  
He thought long and hard about an exit strategy before sirens filled the air and broke his focus. Kenobi looked around frantically looking for whatever had set it off as the red backup lighting kicked on  
The slam of a door being kicked in as a large chunk of metal flew past his head  
“Maul”  
“Kenobi. I assume you didn’t plan on staying the night?”  
Obi wan was confused and slightly relieved that - another flying pice of metal cut his split second thought short as it slammed into the left wall. General grievous had cut into the room as well  
“General kenobi. The- maul? I didn’t expect you to be running a place like-“  
His sentence was cut short by the sound of a clattering vent and asajj ventress jumping down from the rafters   
“Grievous? Maul? I never thought I’d see you two rejects actually worki-  
“I am not working with him!” They both yelled pointing at each other 

All three of them stood around kenobi lightsabers drawn extremely confused for a few seconds before maul quickly slashed the restraints and grabbed kenobi by the back of his collar dragging him along as he ran back the way he came

The other two where right behind him though and the door he threw was cut in four as grievous gained on him down the hallway.  
Grievous grasped at kenobis robe but maul thew obi wan behind him and locked sabres with grievous.

Asajj took the opportunity to run up grievous’ back and leap over the two of them taking kenobi by the wrist and continuing to run down the hall

They turned a corner as grievous was thrown down the hallway loudly slamming into the wall. He grabbed kenobis arm and kicked ventress down in the same movement. He split his free arm into two to fight off his double sabred opponent and keep control of kenobi.  
Kenobi didn’t dare fight back as he knew what’s good for him and these idiots where his best escape plan.


	2. Strangest rescue: 2 kenobi keep away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenobi is extremely confused as his rescue team plays deadly keep away with him

Maul slashed for grievous’ hand holding kenobi and kenobi ducked from the blade. Grievous had to retract his hand to have it not cut off and maul made a break for it own the next hallway dragging kenobi buy the robe. Grievous’ attention was quickly won back by ventress though as she went for a lower sweep.

Maul and kenobi where now some distance from grievous and asajj and maul slowed down  
“Do you remember the layout kenobi or where you conscious on the way here?”  
“Are you seriously telling me your lost? And here I thought you where the smart one”  
Maul grabs more of the fabric tightening his hold on kenobi and growls “I don’t know i just heard of an opportunity and took it! I didn’t think it would come to this”  
Suddenly about ten security droids appear around one of the corners and start firing. Maul deflects some shots before sliding kenobi across the floor to nock them off balance and jumping forwards to cut them all in half in one fell swoop. When he lands he grabs kenobi by the shoulder and pulls him up  
“Looks like we make a good team”  
“Mmm.”  
“Well we might make a better one if I actually had a lightsaber?”  
“Not a chance”  
They walk right into a crowded control room and maul deflects the Laser fire to protect kenobi as he use his free hand to smash the control panels into some juicy unsuspecting organics.  
Kenobi groans at the mess he made  
“Was that really nessasary?” He asks standing in the doorway arms crossed.  
Maul doesn’t answer. Instead looking at what’s left of the panels. The control room is at a crossway of four corridors and maul is studying a map of the facility when obi-wan lets out a cry  
Its ventress force pulling him down one of the halls.  
Maul reacts in an instant force pulling him the other way. Kenobi is suspended in the middle of the room in the force tug of war.  
Each arm is being pulled apart and he lets out a pained cry.   
He feels like he’s being ripped apart   
*clack clack clack clack*  
Suddenly grievous tackles him right out of ventress’ and mauls force tug of war shielding his head with one hand as he lands in a roll and immediately springs back to standing as he sprints down the hall carrying kenobi in his two left arms  
“No!” They both yell as they recoil slightly from the tug of war   
“Don’t damage my merchandise!” Grievous yells back and laughs as he replaces a strand of obi-wans hair. He doesn’t get far before the two angry dathomirians catch up to him though and he lets go of obi wan to deflect the ferocious flurry of incoming attacks. Obi wan ducks behind him and gasps.

Grievous is good but not that good and he’s losing ground fast backing from the brutal attacks. Maul is on his right and ventress is on his left and both are unrelenting.   
“Grievous”  
“Grievous!”  
But the cyborg isn’t listening to kenobi he’s far to distracted  
“GRIEVOUS!” He shouts as he is backed into the pitfall grasping at grievous’ cape.


	3. Strangest rescue: 3 pitfalls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pitfalls and peril as kenobi still has no clue what’s happening and ventress is a smug lil b*tch

Grievous hadn’t noticed it open and the dathomirians had temporarily forgotten about obi wan, but all three of them noticed now.  
Obi was felt himself being lifted off the cape and let go. He closed his eyes and held his breath entrusting his life to two Sith and two of his arch nemesis. Remarkably he felt himself gently make contact with the ground on the other side.  
As he watched the three resume the fight on the other side he briefly contemplated running now, but remembers they still are his best plan for escape. He watches grievous parry ventress and dodge against a wall accidentally creating an opening for her to jump over the pit wall to wall all the way to kenobis side   
“Cya later boys!” She calls happily as she grabs him by the wrist and continues down the hall at just a light jog.   
Grievous lets out a noise of frustration and jumps onto a wall, sinking in his claws and running across it like a spider.  
Ventress picks up speed.   
Maul lets out a growl of frustration, and not to be out done takes a running start and leaps clean over the pit.  
Ventress navigates through the maze with accuracy as grievous and maul are hot on her tail, slamming each other into the walks to try and keep the lead over each other. They run into a few patrols of guards but this most over qualified rescue crew makes quick work of them.   
Finally ventress makes a sloppy turn putting her and kenobi in arms reach of the cyborg general, who throws ventress back as a distraction and makes off with kenobi. Ventress is almost thrown directly into the waiting blade of maul, but she manages to redirect the slash into her Sabre. Maul flicks ventress over and being him to run for grievous, but the two are cut off by a large detachment of guards. Maul fights them off with ease but he’s lost the trail due to the delay, and ventress takes the opportunity to slip away.  
“AUGHHH HH”   
Maul screams as he throws his lightsaber down and started pacing, thinking.

“Is anyone going to explain what’s happening?!” Pants obi wan trying to keep up with the cyborg   
“Not right now” Grievous calls half dragging kenobi through the halls. “Blast... they have the whole place locked down” Grievous stops and looks at the large blast door that was presumably going to be their exit.  
“Are you telling me nobody came with a solid exit plan?! You all just came out on a whim to rescue me. I would be extremely flattered if this wasn’t life or death”  
“I have one” ventress calls from the vents above, force snatching kenobi  
Grievous cry’s out In attack and starts slicing into the vents. Ventress falls out right above Grievous locking sabres with him briefly before flipping backwards to land in from of him  
Kenobi watches from the vents and rolls his eyes  
Ventress makes a slip and grievous ends up with his sabres at her neck, he grabs her two and adds them to his collection   
“Now you where saying something about having an escape plan?”  
Ventress smirked smugly


	4. Strangest rescue: 4 final showdown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ventress leads grievous and kenobi into a hastily made trap. And it costs her

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo! Second to last chapter boys

“Yes. The main hangar. The blast doors somehow shorted out” she says sarcastically “and I have my ship waiting there. So if you’ll kindly-“  
She ducks under the slash with imposed flexibility as grievous moves to decapitate her. She jumps into the vent but before she can grab kenobi the floor falls from beneath him and he is caught by Grievous. The situation wasn’t completely ideal but maybe she could take kenobi when Grievous got intercepted. She made her way through the vents as quickly as possible 

“I trust you know where the main hanger bay is?” Kenobi asks as he’s slung over grievous’ shoulder and blood rushes to his head  
“Of course I know where that is” he growls angrily running down the hall.   
As he turns the corner to the hanger bay it’s not only ships that are staring grievous down but also a very angry zabrak.   
Grievous lets go of kenobi and charges maul who does the same. Both are a flurry of light and obi wan doesn’t think he’s seen either go that fast. He gets up and heads for one of the ships  
“Going somewhere?” Ventress asks walking forward to meet him  
“As a matter of fact I was. You’ve been a great help to me and I thank you, but I think it’s time for me to leave.” Kenobi tries diplomatically, even though he is sure that isn’t going to fly.   
Ventress just sighs and grabs him by the wrist. Kenobi remembering she has no weapon immediately threw her directly into the ground. The thud alerted the other two. Maul payed it little mind but grievous came running over slashing at Ventress on the ground, who rolls left and right to evade the attacks. She spots her sabres and forces them to her hands. Grievous lets out an exasperated sigh as she ignites them and deflects his next attack.  
Maul tired of waiting his turn jumps over grievous to plant his Sabre in his back but his enraged yell gives away his element of surprise and grievous directs the strike away from his internal organs. Kenobi tries to run again but Ventress grabs him by his collar and pulls him back towards the fight. All three take strikes at each-other as they all take turns moving kenobi between them. At some point during the fight maul decides to take swings at kenobi in any opening as well, making kenobis frantic dance to avoid sabres almost impossible, until grievous throws him behind him (something that’s happened at least 4 times in the span of like 5 minutes) and he grabs his lightsaber back.  
“That’s going to make things more difficult” says Ventress as she ducks under mauls blade  
Maul lets out a very angry cry and force pushes the emergency alarm. He then plunges his blade into grievous barely missing his heart. The three are right back to fighting seemingly ignoring kenobi in favour of defending against maul who is now going at seemingly 5x speed. Guards flow into the hanger from three different entrances. There have to be hundreds in total. Ventress is suddenly distracted deflecting blaster fire and maul manages a shallow strike into her back. She lets out a cry and falls forward. Before maul can finish the deed one of grievous’s spare lightsabers not deflecting fire takes a swing taking his attention.   
Kenobi now dealing with his own fire makes a run for her ship, but she force trips him and grabs him trying to take him with her. Obi wan escapes her grab and she makes no more attempt as she closes the ramp behind her.   
Kenobi glances around for another ship and spots a fighter relatively close by. He also notices that grievous is gone and maul has taken to slaughtering every guard in the hanger. And he’s doing a good job of it to.  
As maul is drawing fire kenobi runs to the fighter and starts up the engines. It only takes a moment before he’s in the air. He decides to give his friend a hand and shoots the remaining guards. He gives maul a little salute but all he gets in return in a glare. As kenobi flies out of the hanger bay he swears he can hear maul screaming his name.


	5. Strangest rescue:5 safe at last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nobody’s going to believe his tail so obi-wan just makes a slightly more believable version.

“How where the negotiations obi wan?” Anakin asked as obi wan climbed out of the fighter  
“Oh as successful as always” he sighed back  
“Thought so. The other ‘warring party’ actually turned out to be allies with them and attacked us. You have good choice in commanders. Cody was on top of the situation almost as fast as I was. I suspect something similar happened to you?”  
“Mmm something similar yes. Negotiations fell through and I spent some time with some old friends”  
“Pff figures. You always leave the hardest parts to me don’t you”   
Anakin and obi wan continue talking about the experience as they both enter a LAAT back to the venator. Obi wan decides his version of the story will be much easier to explain to the council when he makes his report.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it. It was pretty fun to write and I hope it wasn’t a pain to read. I felt it needed a short little end pice.


End file.
